Get feedback and edits for your children's book
Children's Book Editing Services
I’ve edited more than 1,000 children’s books, both self-published and traditionally published, and I’d love to help you. I’ll tell what you’re doing well and what could be improved with your story. I’ll also make comments and edits on the manuscript itself.
Three ways I can help:
Focus on language
The difference between the right word and the almost right word is like the difference between desert and dessert. The most common edit I make is condensing — most writers have extra phrases tacked on, and it's important to make the book as concise as possible.
Refine the story
Will every child end your book with a smile? I help you fine-tune the story so that kids will want to read it again and again. To do this, you have to avoid cliched stories, stoke rising action, get the pacing right, and have a climax.
Focus on characters
Are you creating memorable characters? Do your characters have wide appeal? Do they stand apart from other characters?
My advice will help you create a character that children won’t ever forget.
Hi, I’m John!
I’ve been an editor since 2009, and children’s books are one of my favorite books to work with. I’ve helped more than 1,000 children’s book authors achieve their dream of publication.
I am a member of SCBWI, the biggest society of children’s book authors in the world, and I’ve also taught creative writing at 4 universities in Southern California. My book, “I Will Shout Your Name,” is published by Press 53.
I also run Bookfox Press, which publishes children’s books (we make it easy for you!).
On a personal note, I have twin boys who are teenagers and I used to read to them every night from our collection of children’s books.
As featured In
Editing steps
Do I edit multiple times? Well, if you want me to read your revised manuscript, I can give you a thumbs up or down for free. If you wanted a second round of feedback like the first round, with an essay and notes in the margin, I can do that for a discounted rate.
You contact me with any questions you might have, and I answer them.
You use the Paypal button below, and email me your manuscript in a Word/text file.
In 7 days I get back to you with edits within the manuscript and an essay describing what your story is doing well and where it could be improved.
If you have any questions about my comments, I clarify what I meant.
Authors I've helped
This is a small sample of writers who have taken my course and/or gotten editing from me.
My style of editing
I am both gentle and firm.
I make a point of telling you all the wonderful things in your story, but also gently suggest the places where it could improve.
As a writer myself, I know it’s difficult showing your work to the world, and I want to encourage you through the revision process.
If you want me to be harder or easier on you, feel free to tell me that in an email when you send your stories, and I can accommodate your needs.
- Evelyn Bookless, author of “Captain Green and the Plastic Scene”
"John provided useful feedback on overall structure and highlighted what was working, which led to the book being picked up by a publisher."
- Brintha J. Gardner, "The Amazing Adventures of Little Right Sock"
"What a pleasure it was to work with John when I was done with the first draft of my manuscript. With his expert editing input, excellent communication skill and helpful recommendations he was able to set me on the right path. My manuscript was improved and I got a good publisher to work with me on my children’s book, which I’m happy to say is now placed in many stores nationwide with global interest."
- Liz Somerville, author of "Rocco the Buffalo"
"John Fox gave me such nice comments, it really meant a lot. And he educated me on the various different techniques used with poems, which was helpful. I will be back for more editing when I finalize my next book."
- Chris Hammond, "Camp Cookie Chris"
"John is intensely committed to what makes a story work. He really understands the principles and he has great imagination to see ways to help strengthen my writing. With John Fox, expect the heart and soul of a true writer and artist. He is very, very good."
- Ollie Wheeler, "So Many Rules"
"John Fox’s services are incomparable. He is efficient, professional, and has superior knowledge of how to significantly improve one’s writing. I was impressed by his timeliness and recommendations—they were spot-on. Everyone loves “So Many Rules.” It debuted at #2 on Amazon New Releases in Children’s Values Books. Thank you, John Fox!"
Pricing for Children’s Picture Books
Under 500 words: $450
500 – 1,000 words $525
1,000 – 2,000 words: $600
2,000 – 3,000 words: $675
3,000 – 4,000 words: $750
Also, these prices are for a single story. Two children’s picture books under the word limit would be more (because I’m writing two feedback essays).
Contact me for pricing if you have multiple stories, and I can give you a discount.
After you’ve paid, email your manuscript to the email below.
— Kamiesha Anderson-Wieder
"Binky The Mermaid: The Fin-Tastic Race was the first book I’ve ever written. John Fox was so easy to work with and was very responsive. He helped me condense my book without losing the story and even gave me advice on the next steps. I could not have done this without John’s help. I am in the process of working on another book and I will use no other editor but John."
- Jacquese Groves
"I wanted to share with you that my book, Sassy Sisters vs The Sock Monster, has been named a finalist in the CHILDREN'S PICTURE BOOK #Ownvoices category of the 2021 Next Generation Indie Awards! Thanks again for all your help with the editing!"
- Jodi Meltzer Darter
"You edited my debut children's book, "When You Lived in My Belly," a couple of years ago. The book has earned a Gold Medal Readers' Choice Award, a Gold Mom's Choice Award, a First Place Purple Dragonfly Award, and dozens of excellent reviews, including Kirkus Reviews. Thank you!"
- Carolyn Franks, "The Tale of Gillie Guinea Pig"
"As the owner of a petting zoo, I didn’t know much about writing a children’s book. That’s where Bookfox came in. John’s attention to detail and understanding of storytelling is brilliant. Sentence by sentence, word by word, he analyzed it all and gave me great notes. The book even ended up winning a BRASS RING AWARD and is now being made into an animated series!"
- Michael Stelmakh, "The Wonderful World of Everything"
"As a first time author, I feel very fortunate to have worked with John to edit my book. It was great to get expert input on the grammar, flow and structure of the book. On top of that, John wrote up an eloquent and actionable commentary with great insights that helped me better identify my target reader, as well as decide on the right type of illustration and format for the book. It was great to work with an expert who understands the book publishing landscape so well."
- Sarah Flores, "Tree Soldier"
"I can’t say enough about John Fox! I’ve discovered that writing a children’s book is quite different than what I’m used to, and John supplied me with information I didn’t even know to look for. His commentary was extremely thorough and eye-opening, and the time he spent analyzing my manuscript is obvious. Not only did I receive an amazing critique, but the way he explained what I was missing was educational. If anyone is shopping for an editor for their children’s book, John is, hands down, my recommendation."
Got a question?
Contact me.
